Things About Yourself and Her
You need to consider the things which a prospective spouse will ask of you. And how much of those things you are willing to accept. In many cases the following questions a sister may ask could determine whether she will want to arrange a meeting with you and her Wali. It is also wise that you be prepared to tell her Wali the answers you have made to these questions so that you will know what to tell her Wali during an inquiry.
1. Are you willing to wear proper Islamic attire. For some scholars means that you must either wear a thoub/distasha that does not fall below the ankles and/ or have something that distinguishes you as a Muslim.
As for your wife, how do you expect her to dress? The bare minimum that some scholars accept is that the hair and neck is covered and that the outer garment is loose and doesn't describe the woman's shape. (Keep in mind that Islamic attire for some scholars understanding goes beyond hijab, some scholars feel there is authentic proof requiring or highly recommending the wearing of abayah/jilbab, and or gloves and face veil . You may only be interested in a spouse who will were abayah/jilbab, etc.) Concerning Islamic attire Khalid ibn Durak claimed that Aisha, said "Asma, daughter of AbuBakr, entered upon the Apostle of Allah sallallahu alayhe wa sallam wearing thin clothes. The Apostle of Allah sallallahu alayhe wa sallam turned his attention from her. He said: O Asma', when a woman reaches the age of menstruation, it does not suit her that she displays her parts of body except this and this, and he pointed to her face and hands. Abu Dawud states that" "This is a mursal tradition (i.e. the narrator who transmitted it from Aisha is missing) the narrator did not meet Aisha, therefore he could not have transmitted the hadeeth from her.Dawud #4029 This hadeeth is inauthentic and inauthentic hadeeth cannot be used to support Islamic rulings. There are a number of Tafseers on the topic of covering some of which are listed here.In The Interpretation of the Meaning of the Noble Quran p.657 Khan, Hilali (Ibn Kathir, Tabari and Al-Qurtubi Sura An-Nur: 31 And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like palms of hands or one eye or both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer dress like veils, gloves, head-cover, apron, etc.), and draw their veils all over Juyubihinna (i.e. their bodies faces, necks and bosoms Sura Al-Azabh :59 :O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers [includes all women not just the wives of the Prophet SAWS] to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so not to be annoyed. And Allah is Ever Oftforgiving Most Merciful. Safiya bint Shaiba:narrated in Bukari #6.282 Aisha used to say: When (the verse): They should draw their veils over their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms, was reveled, (the ladies) cut their waste sheets at the edges and covered their faces with the cut pieces. Tafseer by Usmani states the following concerning 33:59 "it means together with covering the body they should also draw some part of the sheet (chadar) over the face. It is given in the Traditions that at the revelation of this verse the Muslim women, hiding their bodies and faces, went out in such a way that only the .
Always keep in mind that a new Muslim (and others) may not be able to practice to this level and they should be advised and not forced but educated about it and encouraged toward it. However, the hair and cloak covering is a protection and honor for the woman. It is also a sign of purity and modesty that she does not want to be lusted after by men. Additionally, a dayuth, is a man who has no jealousy that men lust after his wife (and female family members) due to her beauty and the scholars give evidences that the dayuth does not go to paradise. This issue is a big deal and can not be taken lightly or delayed in addressing. Men are the protectors of women and if a man is being a man, then he tries to protect his wife and family from the eyes of other men.